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Dear men! It is about time you understand that a Man Doing House Work is not a crazy idea. It is time that you understand that your responsibilities at home are as equal as your responsibilities outside home.
Gender equity is not reserved only when you demand rights of equal pay for your wife or when you vouch for women getting promotions as well.
Gender equity happens when you come back home and help your wife with the chores and children with their schoolwork. It happens when you are equally responsible for the upbringing of your children and their education as your wife is.
Just because you are a “man” and you go out every day to earn, you are not discounted from the work that is required to run a house, especially if your wife is working.
You are both cogs of the same machine. One cog cannot overwork while the other proves their superiority based on a gender they were born with.
Simply put, if you are a man and you work 9 to 5 but that’s the only thing you do, stop, and read this. Your job might be an 8-hour thing every day, but your wife works throughout the clock.
She works at her office, comes back to do the household chores while also helping kids with everything. On the other hand, you come back home from work and demand everything to be as you want.
If you are a man reading this and this sounds a lot like you, it is about time you man up. Here is how your job doesn’t stop at the tasks you are paid for.
It goes into your home where you have to help your wife and kids. If you want to be a better husband and father, here is how you can be one. Simply put Man Doing House Work is not too much to ask.
Engage In House Chores & Childcare
Have you ever found your wife saying that she is going insane with all the work? Or has she ever complained that you never help her out with kids? Chances are both have happened quite a lot of time.
And chances are that both times you acted defensive and threw a tantrum. Now is the time to stop that.
As a father and husband, it is your job to ensure that you are equally invested in running your home.
When you come back home from work, help your wife cook dinner and clean the house. If you are the first one to arrive, start working on the dinner so she can feel appreciated and helped.
With kids, take your time to ask them about their day. Help them with their homework and help them prepare for the big exams coming ahead. Stay updated with their hobbies and other leisure activities and lend the support they need.
When you do this, you might end up even more tired than you usually day but believe me when I say, when your head will hit the pillow at the end of the day, you would be more contented and at peace, than you have ever been.
Be A Part Of Cognitive Labor
So, what exactly is cognitive labor? A woman is burdened every day with a mental list of things that needed to be done? Picking children from school, helping them with the big project, doing groceries, dropping laundry, etc. the list never ends.
While these might all be physical tasks, the remembrance and keeping the list every day adds to them because of the cognitive energy required.
Take this labor off from your wives. Divide the tasks as per who is better at what. Half of them should be your responsibility while the other half can be taken care of by your wife.
See what is convenient for her while you take care of what’s convenient for you. You are a team, act as such, and work together for a harmonious and stable household.
Support Your Wife’s Career
Whenever a man is asked why he isn’t as involved at home as he should be, the answer is always straight up that he needs to focus on his career.
Further explanation is that he must focus because then he will get a promotion and more salary which will lead to a better lifestyle for the family.
But if your wife is also working then it applies to her as well. Do not walk over her aspirations and be supportive of her career the way you are of your own.
Recognize that your wife is working, running a home, and looking after children as well. In between all of this, she also desires to reach up the career ladder.
Help her in doing that. When she has to stay late for a presentation or a work meeting, prepare food and help children with their homework. Take over her tasks for the day.
When she is working on a pitch from home, help her with it and allow her some alone time away from kids and house work so she can focus.
You are both a team and if she can compromise for you to fulfill your dreams and aspirations, so should you.
Prioritize Family Responsibilities
Many a man do not feel shy from going out with their friends after work or saying yes to a party or dinner reservation out of the blue.
On the other hand, women can never do that. If they have a plan with colleagues or friends, they have to make it way ahead in advance so arrangements can be done for home and kids that day.
You must realize that you have to compartmentalize your work and prioritize your family responsibilities.
Always think that if you bail out on going home early that day what repercussions would there be for your wife. Just like you measure your tasks and performance at work, do the same at home too.
I don’t mean that you should stop hanging out with friends and living your life other than at home. I only mean that it should not overshadow your life at home and the things you must do with your family other than just providing them with money.
Be A Role Model For Your Children
Last, but most important. Your children look up to you because you are their father who they love and want to be like when they grow up one day. Leverage this and inspire them to be the best versions of themselves they can be.
Every day other than dinner time and the homework or education slots, spend time just talking to your children and communicating with them.
Play their favorite games, watch their favorite shows, go out for a walk, or read with them. Do their favorite personal activities so they can bond with you and create a genuine connection with their father as it should be.
Being a role model and a person, they can always look up to for their good times and bad times & through thick and thin is integral.
You will become their beacon of hope, securing their confident and positive future with a loving family for the decades to come.
These were just some of the ways through which men can play an active part in their family life. Remember that there is a thing called household equity, which implies that men and women work together to create a harmonious home.
Be a part of it instead of using your gender as an excuse to further strengthen the useless societal notions. Family is everything, prove that!