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Easiest way to Kill your relationship is by Overthinking in Relationship. Almost all of us are guilty of overthinking various aspects of our relationship.
A lot of us are guilty of Overthinking in Relationship nearly all the time about whether it is going to work, whether it is the right choice or not, or whether we should take a step back or forward, etc.
Every person who is guilty of Overthinking in Relationship imagines themselves as the only one struggling with the pestering thoughts. But that’s not true. In fact, overthinking the dynamics of a relationship is very common.
You would wonder why do we do it? And why is it so common? Believe me, when I say, it isn’t just you, but many people out there in happy relationships who are constantly plagued by thoughts that do not serve them.
Let’s explore it together.
Why Do We Become Obsessed With Overthinking in Relationship?
Most of the time, Overthinking in Relationship stems from the personal insecurity of past failed relationships or detachments because of parental issues for a lot of people. We have seen our parents getting hurt, or past breakups leaving us tormented.
It is our body’s defense mechanism to constantly keep us alerted because, we don’t want to be hurt again. This gives birth to insecurities, which in turn produces Overthinking in Relationship as a coping mechanism.
Moreover, a lot of the time we also start panicking at the thought of a happy relationship. Because we have been hurt before and now being happy feels like a threat because it could just as easily be taken away.
The overthinking becomes a reason to sabotage and protect oneself from the misery that might accompany breaking up.
Even though there are so many other reasons, another common one is the difference in love languages that force us to do Overthinking in Relationship. Some people are very expressive with their words while others are not much and would rather do acts of service like doing small things to make you feel loved. When the love language doesn’t match, and we don’t understand that we tend to overthink that the relationship isn’t for us.
Obviously, none of this is true a lot of the time. It is just our brain’s way of not being accustomed to a comfortable relationship that is most likely meant to last.
How To Stop Overthinking In A Relationship?
Trust Goes A Long Way!
Well, if this isn’t true then what is? Trusting your partner and being faith in them is a significant part of any relationship. In fact, I would go on to say that it is the most important part.
If you trust your partner and do it blindly in full faith, you will know that both of you are equally invested and are bound to make things work no matter what.
Those who indulge in Overthinking in Relationship are mostly those who do not have full trust in their partner. So, find out why, and then place your trust in them so you can have a peaceful relationship with no anxieties surrounding it.
Building trust is the start of any healthy relationship and if you have it fully, there is no way you can end up overthinking like the way you do.
Talk To Your Partner
Another important thing to do is to talk it out with your partner. If you are Overthinking in Relationship because you do not trust them fully, think of a reason because there is always a back story.
Think of why you are not placing your full trust. Once you have the reason, share it with your partner so both of you can know what’s causing this hiccup for you.
When you share it with your partner, it would give you a sense of ease because you would be able to hear the answer that will help you out.
Talking is the essence of the relationship and I am sure once you both talk about this insecurity, you will have a much more peaceful future.
Rewire Your Thinking
What helps the most is finding out the destructive thinking patterns and rewiring them to think constructively. When you start Overthinking in Relationship, you create problems, scenarios, and issues that do not exist.
You keep looking for clues and things that will upset you and lead you to believe that you were right to overthink and doubt your partner.
The key is to realize this hazardous thinking pattern and actively work against it. You have to accept that there are various things about your relationship that you can’t control. So, stop thinking about them and be faithful to the power of life.
Every time you start spiraling, remind yourself that it is just your mind playing tricks on you. Worrying about what’s going to happen never helps and it is essentially worrying about something that isn’t even a reality yet. Do a mindset reset so you can be 100% in the relationship.
Talk To Your Friends
Yes, friends are the best form of therapy! Sometimes talking to your best friends can help bring so much into focus. Your best friends know your partner and can most likely help you with your erratic thinking and insecurities.
They might be able to help you judge the situation wisely and point out areas where your overthinking is just turning you paranoid.
Talk about things you want to get out of yourself and with the help of friends, process all the emotions that surface so you can go back to a healthy relationship.
Stop Overthinking In A Relationship
Overthinking in Relationship is a painful reality, especially when you are in a relationship. But learning how to stop it and get rid of it is a process that is slow and deliberate.
Once you start intentionally practicing happy thoughts and removing those that do not serve you then you will eventually learn to have an empty mind. Always remember that this process might take time and you should not be so hard on yourself.